Not who am I but WHAT am I? 
I don't think I can be a NORMAL person, but I look in a mirror & what looks back looks normal. In it's mind it feels confused & cold. Yes cold hard thoughts ...

fighting 
I have been suffering from depression for 15 years,ever since my last year at school.Ive tried every anti depressant under the sun,and still no cure.Every ...

22 years of feeling depressed because of childhood memories ..sufficating inside. 
I think I always knew something was wrong, but I just kept pushing it further and further down. Some days, I am absolutely fine more than fine and then ...

abandoned and alone 
I had a beautiful husband, married 10 years. I became pregnant with our 3rd child and he changed. He started to withdraw and was verbally abusive. He wasnt ...

20 and constantly worried 
I'm 20 years old in my second year of university, I should be enjoying everything right now because I am surrounded by so many amazing people who love ...

63 years old and depressed 
I've always been asocial and subject to mood swings. When I was in college I had my first long-lasting period of negativity that took over a year to recover ...

black hole and centrifuge 
What does my depression look like... as I have mixed-episode, rapid-cycling bipolar disorder, my depression can look pretty mixed up and unpredictable ...

My life is worthless - 8 abortions abused more then i can count and raped even more 
I am 16 years old and you probably think i should be going out and having fun right? But instead I'm telling you my story of the hard times I'm going ...

unchecked depression surfacing after years and almost destroying my life 
Hi Merri,
I am 25. I have been feeling fearful and anxious throughtout my school life. I was very shy and quiet. I would do mischief in a group. I was ...

I pray for death... 
Three straight years of medication jumping, side effects, being sick, and watching my life go down the toilet. I have a husband and four kids, and I couldn'...

Free Falling Fear 24x7  
Like the old question: "Which came first the chicken or the egg"?


Which came first for me: Was it the depression or the emotional havoc that I was ...

The depths of hell. 
I was 30 years old when this monster hit me and it hit me hard. I fought it for 18 months without sleeping much and watching it destroy me and and family....

Afraid that I will be afraid for life...  
I have had a tendency to become sad in my comfort zone because this is how i really feel, since i was a teenager, i was popular, went out, loved new things ...

Down and out, scared and afraid 
I wake up with anxiety each morning. The thought of how I am going to get through another day scares me. I then begin to withdrawn and find myself calling ...

loser 
on and off meds for 20 yrs,somethings not working,i feel literally dead,i sleep 12 hrs.a day,i hate my life.

Julie's life living in the dark valley of depression 
I was dx'd as bipolar over 20 years ago. I have been on meds and have pretty much been stabilized until this economy hit. My exaggerated credit card ...

Seeing Black and White When You Know the World Should Be In Color 
Depression distorts our perceptions. You always know, at some level, the world has color, because you remember it, before the depression. You feel like ...

I think I hate myself 
I always cause my husband to get annoyed and upset. It happens almost every day. I almost cry every day as well. It's like I wait for, or just want something ...

My long, complicated story which I think led to my depression 
Everything was fine up until the end of last year. I had a good bunch of friends who I trusted with my life, a pretty good relationship with my parents,...

Staring up from the bottomless pit 
I have everything in the world anyone could want, yet I don't even want life at the moment.

Years of chronic lower back pain has worn me down. I am ...

depressed beyond cure 
everyday begins with unbelievable disappoitment.have a job that makes me feel angry and worthless. if i didnt exit no one would care. dont have a career,...

Teenage Depression 
Im almost sixteen, and a girl. I never want to leave the house, and whenever my friend's ask me to go anywhere with them I make excuses, and they get annnoyed ...

Where is my love? 
A typical day in my depression: I wake up thinking, "Great - another day" *sarcasm...* Then I proceed to stumble through the day attempting to find joy ...

don't want to live 
I wake up in the morning and wish I was dead. I finally drag myself up and then don't have enough time in the day other than make meals and clean. I ...

190lbs weightloss and lost 
am a 35yr old man. I live at home with my parents and have never been able to move out of home as I am not financially independent. I had lived my whole ...

My Life 
I am the Mom of five girls. I have been married for 19 years. I work full time (part of the time from home.) I am extremely depressed during the Winter ...

mildly manic 
I've been mildly manic for almost my whole life. I remember experiencing terrific highs and horrific lows since early childhood. I don't think my mood ...

S**t Talking Demons 
My depression comes in the form of very discouraging voices. They like to tell me I'm a looser and a jerk and a failure and that I'll never make it and ...

Numbness inside 
I feel so empty inside and all along. I don't want to end my life. I just want some relief and be able to talk with people who are going through depression....

24 years of nothing  Not rated yet
Hello, i am on Suicidal Crisis, and i never told anyone about it before. The fact is i don`t realize my way to depression until last three months. While ...

the big D  Not rated yet
My story with depression is mostly about the symptoms. I feel slowed down like I would like to take a nap, I do better if I allow a time limit on the ...

Life is quite exhausting...  Not rated yet
I have been on an anti-depressant for over seven years now, total. I did stop taking zoloft for 6 months here, another 8 months there, but I ended up having ...

Getting Better All The Time  Not rated yet
Lately I've felt the need to just share all this with someone, write it all down, anonymously. Hopefully, someone can take something from my story. So ...

Extremely Depressed  Not rated yet
I left a toxic 23 year marriage in Florida with the help of a high school sweetheart so I could try and start a new life with my father out in Southern ...

darkness  Not rated yet
it is extreme darkness.nothing is positive.its feels like a deep well and you can never crawl up. being unemployed and broke there is no hope of help from ...

13 And Severely Depressed? (Abuse)  Not rated yet
I'm 13 and an 8th grader. There has been alot that I have been through my whole 13 years that I have been living, sometimes it seems to bad that I've already ...

Just Existing  Not rated yet
My initial reaction was to say that my depression was a big venomous snake with big fangs and scary looking eyes. But then I thought about it and realised ...

Depression, 4 years and counting....  Not rated yet
Im 22 years old and my life for the past 4 years is...nothing! absolutely nothing!

It started around when i was 18-19.At first there were simply ...

Hollow Claustrophobia  Not rated yet
It is like I am empty on the inside but held in on the outside. Depression holds me back. It keeps me from being outgoing like I know I could be. It makes ...

lifes a climb but still struggling (story of childhood abuse)  Not rated yet
Hi guys

you dont know me but in a way i feel like i know you all with all the problems you have suffered in your life i can relate too also.

My name ...

WHAT IS DEPRESSION  Not rated yet
I have been suffering from depression for the last 15 years. I am not afraid of death as much as I am afraid of depression. I can easily quantify as to ...

Swinging at the air, fighting is exhausting  Not rated yet
When I was 8 yrs old, I was told the truth about my father. He had committed suicide when I was 4. He had bouts of depression and not sure if he was manic....

Tired and ready to run away  Not rated yet
My typical week is waking up about 7:00 am and getting my daughter ready for school Monday through Friday. Thursday through Monday I work a swing shift ...

Exhausting thoughts  Not rated yet
In high school a friend said to me, "You think too much!" and essentially that has been the bane of my existence. I go around and around with thoughts ...

A Dark Hole  Not rated yet
I have always been creative...musically inclined and a writer @ heart. My depression is hereditary I believe...my father,now deceased was bi-polar...never ...

A Panic Attack  Not rated yet
This is about last four months. That I fall in the pit of depression.It was a massive attack for me since last seven years.I can say that I was so much ...

Choice Between Life and Death  Not rated yet
Depression for me was laying in my bed, with a physical weight on me, like extra gravity, stopping me from moving. I had no desire to do normal activities,...

Depression/anxiety for 15 years  Not rated yet
I have severe depression/anxiety. I have tried almost all of the mixtures of meds (except lithium). I have recently had transcranial magnetic stimulation ...

why me??  Not rated yet
At times I feel so worthless and tired. I don't want to do anything but lay around but my 2 year old daughter won't let me. My past issues are playing ...

My battle  Not rated yet
Depression stopped me experiencing life. I’m still grieving over the years of my life that I lost to depression. Although I existed in those years, I wasn’...

depression scares me  Not rated yet
Hi, I am now waking up to this depression thing. from what I can remember I went to see my doctor because at that time of the month I find I got depress,...

My depression looks like a colourful bird with broken wings who has been struggling to mend them for too long.  Not rated yet
A year ago I could fly with joy and interest in everything I saw, I knew the safe skies for me and would always stop to appreciate the rainbow. Now i am ...

Depression Desert Island  Not rated yet
I've been trying to work out how to survive as comfortably as I can on this desert island for some time now. Over five years would you believe? This Island ...

my depression  Not rated yet
hi to all and to merri in special.all of this begins with a strong panic attack.I thought i was dieing.they began to bother me in every day.and after anxiety ...

alone  Not rated yet
I have had anxiety since the birth of my daughter 10 years ago looking back i think it was post natal depression i got better after the divorce from my ...

nothing can make me excited  Not rated yet
My eldest daughter died five years ago, she was turning sixteen and would have been twenty one. We were not on best terms when she died and that is why ...

What I am capable of achieving and the wall of prevention: Depression  Not rated yet
I have no ability anymore to think, act, and even communicate creatively. Lost to my friends, I can't make simple jokes, I can't write my music anymore,...

Normal from the Outside  Not rated yet
From the outside looking in on my life, I look completely normal. I get up every morning to clean my house, take and pick the kids up from school, make ...

My depression looks very powerful in the mornings then it loses some of its strength as the day goes on.  Not rated yet
I've been feeling down for about the last 3 weeks. Some may say..."good grief, what are you worried about? I've been depressed for years". The reason I ...

Slightly Depressed  Not rated yet
I have been on med's for my anxiety and since then most days have been great. I must say to all of you's who are critical about med's, they work! I guess ...

Another Self  Not rated yet
I used to think that I could pinpoint when my depression began but after closer analysis of past events in my childhood I believe that I have suffered ...

Around and around, where is my water glass?  Not rated yet
I walk. I walk around and around in this blasted messy kitchen. I don't know where my water glass is. Where are the kids? It is too quiet. Now, wait, what ...

These days  Not rated yet
I'm now 23 years old and have struggled with depression since I was 17. My focus for the last five years was finishing college, something I am very pleased ...

AN EVIL HEAVY DARK SPIRIT ON MY BACK TRYING TO DRAG ME TO THE GROUND EVERY DAY  Not rated yet
I have been on antidepressants now for 3 an half years. Tried twice to come off them, each time ending up back the same.

When im down i have horrible ...

Rage without drugs  Not rated yet
I was diagnosed with Post-Partum depression 13 years ago after my 2nd son was born. I've been on various anti-depressents over the years, gone to various ...

trying to climb out  Not rated yet
i am 47 years old and raising a grandson who just turned 5. ive had him for the past 3 years. my son has custody, but works out of town most of the time....

A strange day every day  Not rated yet
I have depression. I am not sure what caused it. I am not sure if it was caused by the death of my father when I was 6 months pregnant or if it came after ...

How many others fake happiness in day-to-day life for fear of being found out?  Not rated yet
I am really lost and desperate. I feel like this has been a part of me for so long now that nothing I can take (medication) or try to change in my behaviour ...

My depression  Not rated yet
I wake up. I loath the day I woke up. The end.

trying to let go of my past  Not rated yet
I was what I consider a happy person through my childhood and adolescence. I went to university when I was eighteen and developed a drink and drug problem....

husband lusting after my sister  Not rated yet
I am 38 years Indian women having 2 kids as my life wos happy with my partner and family was very happy and enjoying.

As at my house I have been accomodated ...

suffering with depression - yet much joy  Not rated yet
It is very difficult to live feeling depressed almost every day. I started feeling depressed when I was 22 years old, I am now 63 years old. I have battle ...

My great life...  Not rated yet
I have a great life that I am thankful for. A loving husband, and wonderful son, even 2 dogs that love me dearly. My depression has been around for about ...

Depression due to chronic illness  Not rated yet
I have been suffering from chronic pain in my left body since 2 years and my doctors have failed to diagnose the cause of this pain. I experience constant ...

IS IT ALL GENETIC?  Not rated yet
I am a 59 year old woman, 5'3" weighing 210 lbs. I was raised by my dear Mother, who is still alive and just turned 80 this week. When Mom married my Dad,...

Tired of No Meaning  Not rated yet
I lost my mom at an early age of life then my dad in my early twenties my sister a little later all from cancer.In my twenties i was involved in a war ...

a world of my own...  Not rated yet
i feel like i'm lost in a world of my own. life happening all around me and my body moves to the motions yet i feel so empty. i feel as if someone has ...

It never seems to end  Not rated yet
It started when I was 10 years old. Death of a loved one. It got worse when my father died when I was in my 20's. Then, after 15 years, my first marriage ...

UNHAPPY WITH MY LOT   Not rated yet
HI THERE EVERYONE WHO'S READING THIS I'M A 56 YEAR OLD FEMALE I'M UNHAPPY WITH MY LOT WHICH IS A 22YEAR OLD SON AND A 55YEAR OLD PARTNER.FIRSTLY MY SON ...

Loneliness  Not rated yet
I have sad (Seasonal Affective disorder) during the winter 6 months it's too long for me and others around me. I tend to want to hibernate in my house ...

trying to be upbeat  Not rated yet
My sleep is fractured during the night. Mornings I struggle to get up. I start the day with dread as I head to my office. Anxiety is my constant companion ...

love ditch  Not rated yet
Iam from India.36 years old.Iam married for 12 years have 2 kids.My husband name is ‘R’.here in India, most of us have arranged marriage.My husband is ...

nothing seems to work - alone  Not rated yet
I am a first year medical student (for the second time) who is struggling daily with depression. Doctors have confirmed that I have hypothyroidism, which ...

blinking light  Not rated yet
in the midst of my depression i find blinking light...as if it was to soon be brightened...as if it was to soon be out...i always asked myself why? why ...

The Louse  Not rated yet
I usually wake up wishing I hadn't. I wait until I feel I MUST get out of bed or I get up because I know something needs to be done soon.

I don't feel ...

Busy Little Place  Not rated yet
There is this place inside my mind where I hide. It is a busy little place. I used to think people who heard voices inside their heads were really mental....

My latest fight  Not rated yet
I have Psoriasis, a disease with no known cause and no known cure. I have learned in the past couple of years that people with this disease (an auto-immune ...