need help with my love

by yoggie


from what i have read i'm not the only one looking for help with a loved one. my gf of a year and a half has a history of depression. the past 7 months she's been in a really bad state, the past 2 1/2 months have been even worse. to the point of i'm lucky if she even talks tom me. for a long time she wouldn't tell me what was going on. when she finally did i was blown away. thinking ok i love you we can work thru this. the past 2 months have been somewhat managable until a bout 3 weeks ago. started accusing me of doing things i wasn't doing and wanted to end our relationship. i told her that we could work thru this and get her better. i keep telling her i love her and i'm not going anywhere and i'm going to be here when it's all said and done.
the words that come out of her mouth I never thought i would ever hear. she has pushed me so far away at times and then out of the blue she can't get enuff of me. i've been doing so much research trying to understand and use it to gain some knowledge. but it's to the point i don't know wether I'm coming or going with her. one minute we're not together just friends and the next she's making plans for the future with me. I just want her to get better, i know she's in there and i get glimpse of her now and then.
when she opens up and talks its for hours at a time and then nothing for weeks or longer. one conversation we had i told her that i loved her and that i knew she loved me. i know she's in there. told her i was going to tell her everyday that i love her cause it's the truth and it's something positve for her to hear. but sometimes i feel like i'm doing more harm then good. Use to get an i know after telling her, now i get a smile. i don't know anymore. i have never had to deal with anything like this before. please help..... i just want her better and to know what i can do to help with this. I'm trying to be as supportive as i can, at the end of the day i get so discouraged wondering if she will ever come out of it. i know it won't happen overnight but i have hope and faith.

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