abandoned and alone

by Pauline
(Australia)

I had a beautiful husband, married 10 years. I became pregnant with our 3rd child and he changed. He started to withdraw and was verbally abusive. He wasnt affectionate anymore and would barely talk to me. I found out he was having an affair with a woman from work. I fought so hard to save our marriage. Tolerating him going back and forth to this woman. He left me with a 5 week old baby. He now barely sees his children and does not want to know anything about the baby. I am so grief stricken, i just want to die. My whole life has changed. I had to move state to be closer to my family. I miss my friends and my old life. I miss the husband he was. He now changed into this horrible uncaring human being. I feel so stupid for putting myself and my kids through this hell. He doesnt care he has hurt me so badly. I feel like a loser, if I didnt have my kids I would of committed suicide. I dont feel like living anymore. Every day is a struggle. I cant see any light at the end of the tunnel. I feel no one will ever love me because I am so damaged.