by chris
(ontario canada)
I wake up in the morning with more weight then i can handle. I always have the same thought that the wrench under my pillow for protection can finally help me. I think about just bashing my skull in first thing. Then i eat go toscholl become more depressed and get into fights to hurt my self. I have no intrest in women anymore i belive that no one can love a man like me. My confidence no longer matter i have no regards for myself i imagine disapering and knowing no one will mis me. I have lost 5 people close to me in the past year. My life is going to hell theres noting i can do about it so i think of death to be happy. Mainly my own and put on a fake face. Sunrise to sunset the only thing in my head is sucide until i start using which makes me feel a little better. I have so many unknown sucide deaths in my head i know at least if i do this im getting somthing right.