20 and constantly worried

I'm 20 years old in my second year of university, I should be enjoying everything right now because I am surrounded by so many amazing people who love and care about me. Instead I worry everyday about everything and everyone and seem to be falling down a black hole every time I try to be positive. I used be such a positive person who would always be optimistic about everything and smiling all the time. Now I can't get out of bed and when I do I end up either having an argument with my family or friends or crying. It's so difficult because I never used to feel like this and I'm constantly frustrated that I can't be that person any more. I don't know what caused it but from an early age people have bullied me until college years which made me discover myself and like who I saw in the mirror. However,this semester has been very stressful and some people have knocked my confidence, which has made me question myself and my aspirations. I feel trapped and I have no excitement to do anything any more. I study musical theatre and I should be excited and enjoying every minute of the opportunity, I have been given but instead I worry about the little things. Nothing used to affect me this greatly and now my behaviour and attitude is affecting everyone around me. This is something I can't bear to see. Everyone's been trying to help me and I'm taking St Johns Wort herbal tablets which help me have better spells. I hate to be the burden though, I'm the one who brings the happy mood down and people tell me I must ask for help but I don't want to be a nuisance, they have so much more important things to be doing.

Some days I have good spells and then other days I have bad spells where I won't talk to anyone or do anything. It's affecting my friendships with people and this is something I can't cope with. I get so paranoid and irritated with my closest friends which upsets them greatly. A few days after I feel so guilty for even questioning our friendships but then the repeat happens. I just feel like I'm in the way and what's the point. It's terrible to think a uni student is not drinking but it does me no good, even the very rare glass of wine at the weekend. I want to be able to have all the good times again and laugh. It makes me so tired just trying to be me everyday and I just need help.

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Dec 28, 2010
Throwing Off Worry
by: Anonymous

I love these promises...

1 Peter 5:7 "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."

Proverbs 16:3 "Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed."

Matthew 6 "There is far more to your life than the food you put in your stomach, more to your outer appearance than the clothes you hang on your body. Look at the birds, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, careless in the care of God. And you count far more to him than birds.

"Has anyone by fussing in front of the mirror ever gotten taller by so much as an inch? All this time and money wasted on fashion—do you think it makes that much difference? Instead of looking at the fashions, walk out into the fields and look at the wildflowers. They never primp or shop, but have you ever seen color and design quite like it? The ten best-dressed men and women in the country look shabby alongside them.

"If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don't you think he'll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving."

Psalm 37

1 Do not fret because of those who are evil
or be envious of those who do wrong;
2 for like the grass they will soon wither,
like green plants they will soon die away.

3 Trust in the LORD and do good;
dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
4 Take delight in the LORD,
and he will give you the desires of your heart.

5 Commit your way to the LORD;
trust in him and he will do this:
6 He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun.

7 Be still before the LORD
and wait patiently for him;
do not fret when people succeed in their ways,
when they carry out their wicked schemes.

8 Refrain from anger and turn from wrath;
do not fret—it leads only to evil.
9 For those who are evil will be destroyed,
but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land.

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