Tired of No Meaning

by tony
(south africa)

I lost my mom at an early age of life then my dad in my early twenties my sister a little later all from cancer.In my twenties i was involved in a war in africa which did not help me in anyway.Today i realize that i have suffered from depression for most of my life.I am very tired of being down and i have tried all sorts of ways to get rid of my depressio.So far nothing has worked however i will continue to seek deliverance from this darkness that threatens to tear me apart.That my wife and children have not left me is pure grace.I still work well or so i am told. I have lost much confidence and of late find no meaning to life.If only i could get out of this pit.


Wow, Tony - you are a survivor and you are right - you are indeed blessed to have a loyal family and a job! There's one step in our e-course that asks questions about emotions that may be helpful. I would also suggest you find a counselor or chaplain gifted in recovering from war and post traumatic stress. You need someone to help process things.

If you killed in the war, can you be forgiven? If loved ones were killed, can you forgive? Here is a story of a woman who spent time in concentration camps and how she forgave...

One of the best things I did was write out each night before bed - 3 things that happened that day that were good and thanked God for them. It was training myself to focus on the good.

I've also stopped watching the news - instead I read it. Because I am visual, I cannot take all those images. Instead, if I read something heavy, I stop and pray giving it to God and ask him to intervene. Wow, has that made a difference! Let me tell you! I don't think it's any coincidence.

Go carefully through our e-course and implement each step diligently also.

There is hope!

Merri Ellen

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