by Colleen MacKay
(New Brunswick, Canada)
I will take you there with me and you will get a taste of my occasional visit to this unimaginable dark and describable place I have to go to quite often,
I have dealing with depression for quite a few years and finally found some of my own words to help those understand a little more. I know I am not the only one who deals with the weight of depression weighing you down each and everyday.
It feels like I want run away but I am paralyzed and stuck in dark place and cannot find away out. I am scared but I can't physically escape my own mind. I feel helpless. Even I don't understand but that's the best way I can describe how I really feel everyday in my own words.
I know that I am not alone and I will be in and out of that dark and paralyzing place with no way out again. You never have to feel like giving up on your own life is the only way out of the heaviness you have to carry with yourself each day. You will learn to cope with the sadness as time passes and you have the right support.
You have to realize the affect it would have on those who love. You have the strength to push through it and try to live normally. You have the power to find your way through the darkness you feel and into the all of those who will help you through the battle with something you cannot see or even understand!
I know I have a lot of things to be happy and grateful for...this is the feeling I have been carrying on my shoulders for years. I know I am strong because I feel like that 24/7 and 7 days a week. It's a part of me and I am aware that I might finally get the help I need. I want to be happy for everything and everyone in my life and there's a barrier blocking me from doing that. Everything that brings me happy is within my grasp and my ambition to free myself from my own personal prison. You can't be save or helped if you don't let anybody know where you are.
Just keep in mind that you are never alone and you just can't see me through the darkness...but I am here with you and I can assure let you there are many more here with us. If we all pull together we can find the right direction finally feel the happiness...which we couldn't see or feel before...taunting us and just within our grasp. I can assure you that you will be okay.
Now you have to help yourself and make the very first step in the right direction.
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